Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Cold turkey

About my father:

*When I was in the 4th grade, for Christmas I asked my father to stop smoking. He quit, cold turkey. No questions asked.

*I bought him my first gift in the 5th grade. A framed poster of a rooster standing tall and proud, and underneath it said,
"I'm the boss of the house and I have my wife's permission to say so."
Two months ago I saw him show it off to my little nephew with the edge of the frame all brittled and falling apart.

*In the seventh grade I made a lazy susan in shop class. Unlike other lazy susans which rolled evenly, mine rolled like a merry-go-around (not intentionally--it was off on a few measurements) low on one end and high on the other. My father put it on the table with soy sauce, chili sauce, kim chi and fish sauce, and held out his hands to catch falling condiments on every spin. Never complained once.

*In the 9th grade, my father bought me a brand new Sentra tennis racket with a fully enclosed bag, because I needed a racket for my tennis team. My father made $10 an hour at the time, the racket cost $60, no questions asked.

*When I was in college my father decided to lose weight. He lost over 30 lbs without ever gaining an ounce of it back. He started exercising and gave up 75% of his rice intake cold turkey.

*A few months ago I decided to take on a plumbing job. My father entered three hours later to a bathroom flooded with a mixture of water and drano and pipes laid about the floor. He tried to put the pipes back, but what I take apart no layman will be able to put back together. My father came back with a mop and towels and we cleaned up the mess while we waited for a licensed professional.

My father turns 70 tomorrow. For his birthday I'm giving up woodworking and plumbing, cold turkey---no questions asked.

Happy birthday dad!

Friday, November 26, 2010

runner up

The other day the lady sitting next to me on the plane asked, "do you speak English?"
Turned out she wanted to chat. Me, I would have opted for a different opening, something like, "how bout dem cowboys?"

It was ironic that it happened when it did because I had just spent four days with an old friend of mine from high school who kept telling me how I was the second whitest Asian in high school (Jamie Woo took first place). Next time if someone asked if i spoke English, i'm going to brag about my runner up trophy in the white washed competition.

Thursday, November 25, 2010

morning thought

I wonder if anyone has ever bought a lottery ticket and think, "these numbers can't go all the way?"

Wednesday, November 24, 2010

leave out all the rest

"When my time comes,
forget the wrong that I've done
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed.
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest."

Dear Mom,

I know you will never read this, but I do want your memories to survive. I try, but you're making it harder and harder everyday for me to leave out all the rest.


Monday, November 22, 2010

morning thought

I'm going to start a business and call it "The Other Half." I will sell socks, but not as pairs but one sock because I have easily 50 socks at home looking for its mate.

Wednesday, November 10, 2010

making the team

True conversation in the car coming home from basketball try outs last friday the 5th.

"What do you think LT?"
"110 percent chance I'm going to make it auntie."

SIDEBAR: when you're young, percentages go from zero to infinity.

"Feeling pretty good there?"
"At any given try outs, the top five kids stand out, and the bottom five kids stand out, it's the rest of the field that the coaches have to weed out."
"Umm okay, and where did you get this from?"
"I'm just saying, that's how it works."

SIDEBAR: "i'm just saying" is code for pulled it out of my ass.

"Okay, you did a good job today of weeding yourself out."
"Your play doesn't have anything to do with it, because we are all pretty much the same level. But, I got it taken care of auntie."
"I'm scared to ask LT."
"I've introduced myself in email this summer, and I've been in his office to chat."
"Chat? Like see how his wife is doing? If he is diversifying his portfolio?"
"Aaaunntttiieee."

SIDEBAR: i have never Eddie Haskelled any of my teachers when i was younger, so i was only half kidding with the whole portfolio thing.

"Talked sports, 9ers, Giants, sports, relationship building stuff."
"Okay LT, no more day time talk shows for you."
"He knows more about me than he does the other kids auntie."
"Here LT, add this box of milk duds to the relationship building."

The list for the 2010-2011 basketball team came out on tuesday. My little nephew (aka little eddie as i refer to him now) made the final cut. Relationship building and milk duds, that's how the Trinhs roll, "i'm just saying."

Tuesday, November 9, 2010

morning thought

The more you read, the better you write.

Fifty pounds later, culinary skills just as bad.

Wish someone had warned me the adage is limited in it's application.

Monday, November 8, 2010

gecko returns

There once lived a beggar named Thach. Thach and his wife saved every penny they collected. One day as he was taking a bath in the river, he noticed a buffalo swimming upstream. According to legends, when a buffalo swims upstream, it is an indication that a famine is coming. When Thach saw this, he took every penny he had and bought all the rice he could.

The famine came and everything was normal for a while. People sold and bought things at the market like it was any other day, but not Thach. He held onto his rice, waiting for the right time to make his move.

Then one day, his village and the neighboring villages ran out of rice because there had not been any rain for the crops. Being the only person with rice, Thach could demand whatever price he wanted. He sold his rice at a very high price and was instantly rich.

He bought a house next to the king. He got servants and only the most expensive items were put inside his house. He bragged that besides the king, there was no one richer and that he had everything in the world one could imagine.

One day, the king's brother heard about Thach's boast and challenged him to a competition. The person that did not own an item that the other one possessed, had to give up his entire estate to the winner.

Each side had their advisers and the contest began. Thach asked for expensive pieces of jewlry and rare artifacts, the king's brother was able to produce the same thing from his house. The king's brother showed Thach famous paintings and lavishe furnitures, Thach had whatever the king's brother asked for. This continued back and forth for a week.

At the end of the week the king's adviser brought out a simple looking clay pot. A pot not made of gold or the finest material, but one made from clay used mainly by beggars and peasants.Thach and his servants searched and searched and searched their palace but could not find one, because he only bought the finest things. And when he couldn't produce the simple clay pot,Thach had to give up everything he owned to the king's brother.

Thach became a poor beggar again. When he died, Thach became a gecko. If you listen carefully to the gecko as his tongue slithers back and forth, you will hear him revealing himself to you. Thach thach thach, he says as he tries to find a warm place to sleep in your house.

---------
I'm sitting next to my mother staring at the fishing poles. Without a cloud to intercept the ray, the sun throws a perfect spiral of light and warmth on the piece of earth I am inhabiting.
My mother points and makes a move towards the fishing pole.
"No no, not yet," the guide tells her.
She edges back to her seat.

I move to the back of the boat, and lay down to the gentle rocking of the waves. With only seven hours of sleep total the past two days combined, the guide can "not yet" all he wants for now. Sleep comes first, fish a distant second, not the usual order in my life but sleep deprivation is throwing my priorities a bit out of wack.

After a few hours, my mother is still staring at her pole, resting against the holder. The guide had instructed her to leave it there,
"The red pole is yours," he had said.

Mine is the blue. Untouched by me.
"The Delta is a great place to fish," I tell the guide.
"You've been here before?"
"Yesterday!"

The tip of red pole kneels down to the water and rises, kneels and rise. My mother makes a move towards the pole.
"No no, not yet," the guide tells her.

A light gentle breeze brushes my face. My mother's hands are itching, itching to touch the red pole. Touching, feeling, snagging that's what you do when fishing.
"Did you catch anything yesterday," the guide turns back to the conversation.
"Did pretty good."

Rise, kneels, rise, kneels the wind, the currents, all natures way of toying with an amateur fisherman. If there is a fish, the tip of the pole bends without popping back.
I shake my head to let my amateur mom know to settle down, she's being played.
"Really, what did you catch?"
"Large mouth bass, striper bass, sturgeons and tons of nice size sun fish."

Rise, kneels, rise, kneels, the guide wants to be the one to hook the fish when the tip bends without popping back.
"I'll hook it and you can reel it in," he had said at the beginning of the trip.

But real fishing is about the fish in the cooler just as much as the fish that got away. Real fishing is about the feel of the sinker as it sets on the bottom of the water. Real fishing is about conquering the current, the wind the tides. Real fishing is about the sliminess of the bait, the wiggle it makes, the smell it leaves on your hand. Real fishing is the feel of the pole. Most importantly real fishing is the satisfaction of knowing a fish is really hooked and no way is it going to escape.

"Want to see?" i ask him.
I didn't wait for his answer. I pull out my phone.
"Eighteen large mouths!"
"Wow, nice size," he says.
"Two large buckets of sun fish about one and a half times the size of my hands," I boasts.
"You caught it here, at the Delta?"
"Right here, yesterday, but a bit more towards that way."
Rise, kneels, rise, kneels, I am about to hook me a guide into doing what I want.
"This picture, eight striper bass, caught about twelve but had to let four go because of size."

Rise, kneels, rise kneels, he wasn't going to get away.

He stands there with my camera up to his face, stunned. I remove the red pole from it's holder and i give it to my mother. She holds her pole for the first time all day. Not a word from the guide as I'm doing this because he knows I can hook a fish just fine.

If I come back as a gecko for my boastful ways, it's well worth it, because real fishing is about holding the pole.