forfeiting heaven

My workday starts promptly at 7ish. My father rolls into the Cafe a little before 9. He helps me out if I'm a little behind, then helps himself to a cup of coffee and the newspaper. The phone rings around 10.

"Is your dad there?"

I look at my father. He shakes his head and waves his hand and returns to the tranquillity of the comics (Tranquillity is not a state my father experiences frequently in the presence of my mother).

"I don't see him mom."

With the exceptions of holidays and days off, I pretty much lie to my mother 340 days a year on behalf of my father. I'm not sure what the magical number is, but I'm pretty sure I'm over the limit of lies allowed to get into Heaven. Let's hope dad takes this into account when making out the will.